Give me a break

My wife and I had lots of mutual friends. And even though we are split up, I still see many of these folk and they still see Tori from time to time as well. In the weeks and months since the separation, I have had opportunity to talk to many of these friends about what happened. Almost all of them have the same thing to say. They say something along the lines of: "Tori never talks bad about you, Todd. She always says how bad she feels about everything that happened and she takes the blame for most of it. She also has said over and over that she only wishes the best for you and hopes you'll be able to move on with your life and find someone who will treat you well, like you deserve and fulfill all your needs and wants in life."

Give me a fucking break. Why is it that whenever a woman dumps, leaves, divorces a man, she always says something along those lines. It freaking makes me crazy. As if by saying a few shmaltzie lines of "well wishes" they can negate all the hurt and ill will they've brought upon their former spouse. It's such bullshit and it just pisses me off.

I talked to Tori's mother recently and damn if she didn't say almost the exact same spiel. It's almost like they're reading from a script. "How to leave your man and still come out looking like the victim" .... or something along those lines.

I'm so sick of hearing that shit. If Tori actually cared that much about me, and actually takes blame for what happened, and actually wishes the best for me, then why the hell did she cheat on me and then turn around and leave me? I hate that shit.

I'd rather the bitch just come out and speak the truth : "I don't love him anymore, I hate him and I fell in love with another man .... so whatever."
That would make more sense and actually be more truthful. At least that way you'd know where you stand.

It's almost like they think they're doing you a favor or something. Like they're saying, "I know I treated him like shit for 3 years so I'll do him a favor and leave him so someone better can come along."

Fuck that.

Instead, why didn't you just start treating me like a human being in the first place and put forth a tiny iota of an effort to make the marriage last?

I realize now that my wife never gave a fucking shit about me ..... I guess it was all a scam. A way to get the hell out of Iowa and start a new life. Paid for by a sucker of a husband. Paid for dearly. In dollars, cents and mental and emotional anguish.

That line about, "I hope he finds someone who will treat him well and all that shit..."
Like I'm going to be able to trust another woman anytime in the near future. I don't know when I'll ever be able to trust another woman. How will I ever be able to have another serious relationship when I can't believe a word the woman is saying to me?

I have no reason to believe my wife ever meant anything she said to me in 3 years. It was all a lie. So why believe the next one when she says, "I love you." ... or "For better or for worse" ..... yeah ... ask Tori about that last one.

I'd just as soon stay single the rest of my fucking life than risk another heartbreak like I'm going through now. It sucks, but it's easier ...... that's for sure.

And what really, really pisses me off. Is that my wife has the unmitigated gall to say this shit while sleeping with another man. Some fuck face she met while we were still married. And she had the gall to violate her wedding vows .... yet she speaks of me like she feels so much love and concern for my well being.

Fuck that.
Fuck her.
Fuck Love.

I don't know if I even believe in the concept anymore.

Fuck her.